Picture it: you get home late from a hard day’s work and your girl’s already asleep, or you wake up first thing in the morning to go to work and you’re in the mood for sex. When you feel like getting it on, but your girl is sleeping, what can you do?
Caution: Whichever way you decide to go about it, always gauge her reaction to your moves. If she seems disinterested, then don’t pursue it. This is not a scenario where too much persistence can be used.
Light candles in the room
The flickering of candlelight might wake her calmly. It’ll be a nice surprise for her when she does. Another alternative could be to turn on some night lights.
Use aphrodisiacs
The above-mentioned candles could have a light vanilla scent or any aroma that is pleasing to the senses. This will fill the room with a pleasant scent that might wake her and put her in the mood.
Play soft music
Put on some soft music in the background. Not too loud, you don’t want to give her a rude awakening. Try something slow and bass-heavy with sensual vocals like Moby or Air; whatever she likes to listen to when she first wakes up.
Caress her stomach, legs & breasts
Caress her thighs, stomach and then move on to the breasts. You don’t want to start off by touching the breasts. Work your way towards them. Take your time; don’t rush any movement. Be delicate and slowly move to heavier petting .
Kiss her
Put your lips on her back, the back of her neck, her neck under her chin and her ear lobes. Use some discipline — no tongue action yet, just soft kisses. Then, gently kiss her lips. Women seem to really respond to this.
Play with her hair
Run your hand through her hair softly and play with it. Lightly massage her scalp. The sensation may serve to rouse her and prep her for what’s to come.
Whisper in her ear
Lean in and in a deep, soothing voice, tell her what’s on your mind. Don’t say anything too graphic and keep your words romantic. Tell her that she’s sexy and you want to be inside her. If you’ve been with her for a while, hopefully you know what words to use to turn her on.
Slide her underwear off
Start by rubbing her pubic area over her underwear; if she responds in a positive manner (which includes moving her body into a more welcoming position, light moaning, etc.), place two fingers under the elastic and head toward her clitoris. Don’t head to the moist part of her vagina just yet; lightly rub the outer lips and then proceed to slide her underwear off. You need to do this at a snail’s pace.
Ride up on her
Press your front against her back, and touch your erect penis against her body so she can feel it. Then, contract it. Hold her from behind — “spooning” her — and keep contracting it every now and again. This should send a not-too-subtle message that you’re ready for love. If you’re lucky she should respond.
Perform oral sex on her
First spread her vagina lips to expose her clitoris with your fingers. Then lightly lick it. Don’t lick it too hard until you’re certain she’s aroused. This will incite different reactions from different women, so you must be responsive to her. After you’ve gently licked her for a minute or so, start doing it a little harder and more conclusively.
Feel her out
Hormones build up overnight during sleep, which make some people quite horny during the night and/or first thing in the morning. However, things like morning breath and a.m. grumpiness turn some women off to morning sex. It’s up to you to know your partner and what she digs.
Adapt as you go to her state of consciousness. It is not recommended to wake your woman during her “deep sleep.” She probably won’t be receptive to your sexual urges.
Whatever way you decide to go about it, gauge her reaction. And remember; if she keeps snoring, then stop.
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So many women worry about how sex will be once they’ve had a baby. One of the most common concerns among women who are pregnant or considering getting pregnant is how child birth will affect their sex life and what they can do about vaginal tightening after pregnancy. To be frank; women, as well as their partners, can’t help but wonder just how much the vagina will stretch and whether or not it will ever be tight again.
Vaginal tightening after pregnancy is possible even in cases where delivery was difficult and involved extensive stretching and even tearing. Most midwives and gynecologists will recommend vaginal strengthening exercises, such as Kegels to help with vaginal tightening after pregnancy. While these do help, they are often not enough because they only work on the muscles and do nothing about the other issues that affect the tightness of your vagina after child birth.
After you give birth, it is not only the vaginal muscles that have stretched but also the skin. This can cause discomfort during sex and make a woman feel less-than attractive down there. As well, our bodies go through various hormonal changes during pregnancy which, for many women, leads to vaginal dryness and even a lowered libido. Kegels will do nothing to help with these things. And, even a drastic measure such as vaginal tightening surgery will do nothing to help you with these other inevitable changes that affect your vaginal health and sexual performance.
Natural remedies for vaginal tightening after pregnancy that address all of these factors is a great way to go if you’re looking for a safe and effective alternative
Any woman who is experiencing discomfort during sex due to child birth or the loosening of the skin of her vagina for reasons such as aging or excessive vaginal dryness due to menopause can benefit from the vaginal tightening methods that we will discuss here.
Seeking out vaginal tightening methods is something that more and more women are doing each day. After childbirth stretches the vagina, it’s not uncommon for a woman to feel a change in the way her body feels during sexual intercourse. The same is true for women who experience vaginal dryness; the skin loses its elasticity and sex becomes less pleasurable, and in some cases even painful. This begins a vicious cycle that causes a woman to associate bad feelings with sex so that her already low libido diminishes even more. If this is something that you are experiencing, then you may want to consider one of the following vaginal tightening methods:
Vaginal Tightening Exercises: Kegels are among the most commonly known exercises used to tighten the vagina and are often recommended by doctors after childbirth as well as before menopause in order to keep the vagina tight, avoid incontinence and pelvic prolapsed, and to help make sex more enjoyable. Done by simply squeezing the pelvic muscles as you would to hold in your pee; Kegels should be performed several times daily over the course of months to see results.
Vaginal Tightening Creams and Gels: With so many vaginal tightening creams on the market, it’s important to do your homework so that you choose one that is safe as well as effective. As a general rule, steer clear of products containing alcohols, dyes, and chemicals you’ve never heard of as they can not only be drying but also cause a severe allergic reaction. Look for a product that is made of natural ingredients. The key to a good vaginal tightening cream is one that provides more than just a temporary effect and rather combats all of the issues that go along with loosened skin and muscles, such as vaginal dryness, irritation and even infection.
Vaginal Tightening Surgery (Vaginoplasty): This surgery is one that is now being offered by more and more clinics and entails pulling back the loose skin and muscle tissue and removing any excess. While the procedure may sound simple enough it is important to remember that it is still surgery and with all surgery, there are risks that need to be considered. Surgery should always be used only as a last resort when other methods have failed to provide the results you want. This surgery involves the use of a general anaesthetic, an overnight stay in the hospital, and 4 to 6 weeks of recovery time. The potential risks involved with surgical vaginal tightening methods includes: excessive bleeding, infection, allergic reaction to medications used during the surgery, and even death.
Although still considered taboo in certain parts of the world, anal sex is quickly becoming a more accepted part of people’s sex lives.
That said, there are certain things you can do to ensure that your backdoor fun is the best it can be, regardless of whether you’re giving it to her or she’s venturing into your region.
Now then, here are six tips to make anal sex pleasurable and a memorable experience for the right reasons every time you engage in the deed.
1- Don’t insist on penetration
Although it’s hard to believe, you don’t need to stick your fingers or penis inside the rectum for the pleasurable sensations associated with anal sex. And although it might be a bitter pill for some guys to swallow, when you’re receiving anal sex, you don’t need to have anything put inside you either.
By simply rubbing the anus or even licking it, known as rimming, the receiving person can derive awesome sensations.
2- Make it feel good all the time
Many women have told us that their first anal sex experience (and sometimes their second and third) hurt like a bitch, but ladies, it doesn’t have to. We’re serious.
Now, if she isn’t calm and relaxed, it’s going to hurt. If you insist on shoving your penis inside her (like ripping off a bandage — one shot), it’s going to hurt. If you don’t use lubrication, it’s going to hurt.
You need to talk about it and both of you need to agree to do it happily; no one should be coerced into it. You also need to be patient and let her lead the way. If you are going to engage in anal sex, let her hold your penis and guide it in slowly. Go in about an inch, then pull out completely, then go in about an inch farther and pull out completely. Keep going in and out at one-inch intervals and pretty soon you’ll be in.
3- Understand that there are 2 sphincters
There are two sphincter muscles in the anus (if you place your finger inside about inch deep and press against the side, you’ll feel them), and they are less than an inch apart.
While you can control the external sphincter at will, the internal sphincter is not the same. It reacts more in a reflexive way. So while your partner may assure you that she’s relaxed and willing, her internal sphincter may prove otherwise.
The point is that you need to be patient and give your partner time to learn how to relax and try different positions to make it happen.
4- Stimulate the anal region while doing other things
The sensation of touching the anus or rectum alone may feel uncomfortable for your girl or even yourself, but couple it with penetration or oral sex, and suddenly it’ll feel much better.
For example, while you’re engaging in vaginal sex, you can insert a sex toy into your girl’s anus to give her the sensation of DP, or double penetration. And she can insert a toy into yours while you’re penetrating her or she’s performing oral sex on you. It’s up to you to decide what you’re comfortable with.
5- Change your diet
For a pleasurable anal sex experience, it’s important for both of you to eat a diet rich fiber, raw vegetables and fruit rather than processed foods.
Regular bowel movements are conducive to both comfort and confidence when it comes to anal sex. Adult film stars about to engage in anal sex always undergo enemas beforehand to ensure no “slip-ups.”
So make sure that your diet is a healthy one and, although fiber is recommended, try to avoid eating it for a few hours before you’re set to engage in anal sex.
6- Obey the rules of hygiene
There’s a reason why women have to wipe from front to back when they do No. 2; trace amounts of feces may cause infection. The same rules apply to anal sex.
If you put your penis or fingers in or around her anus, you cannot simply revert to her vagina afterward. There are ways to resolve this issue, however.
You can always discard the “anal sex” condom and put on a new one for vaginal entry.
As for your fingers, you can always keep baby wipes close by and wipe your hands before you use them on her vagina.
Remember; you can go from the vagina to the anus, but not the other way around. Hopefully you know your female anatomy.
Back Door Man
Ensure anal sex is fun by making certain that you and your girl are comfortable. If she gets squeamish when you suggest it, find out why. Don’t be afraid to communicate about sex and what you like; it’ll bring you closer together and enhance your sex life.
Keep in mind that anal sex can be very dangerous and spread STDs, so unless you’re in a monogamous relationship and you’ve both been tested for diseases, we strongly urge you to use condoms and latex barriers in anal sex and any other variety of sex.
Some people like to give and some like to receive, but with the 69 position you can have the best of both worlds. This position is designed for mutual, simultaneous oral sex. It may be a little more difficult to concentrate on what you’re doing with your tongue when she’s busy at work between your legs, but the novelty of being pleasured while pleasuring her is one that is worth the effort.
When it comes to 69ing, there are some dos and don’ts. In order to make it a pleasurable experience for both of you, check out AM’s 69 etiquette. For the purposes of this advice, we’re referring to 69ing as foreplay, so we won’t cover ejaculation etiquette, which could probably inspire an entire article of its own.
Take a shower
As with all sexual acts, especially those involving oral stimulation, it’s imperative to be clean and well groomed down below. Nobody wants to be greeted by unpleasant odors or a jungle of hair; this is bad 69 etiquette. So if you’re going to try out the 69 position, clean up and keep it trimmed. Better yet, jump in the shower together so you can ensure both of you smell and taste fresh and clean.
Initiate gradually
You should make a point of easing her into it, especially if it’s the first time you’ve 69ed with her. Don’t just throw her on top. Make the transition part of your foreplay and gradually get into position. She should take the hint from there.
She goes on top
If one of you has to be on top in the 69 position, it should always be the girl. Chances are, you are heavier than she is and allowing her to take the top position will prevent her from being crushed if the 69 session takes a while, or if you get too carried away. This also helps you to avoid accidentally kneeling on her hair. Another benefit of her being on top is that she can control the speed, depth and angle of penetration, so you’re less likely to accidentally gag her. Letting her have control means better oral pleasure for you, so this is really a no-brainer in terms of 69 etiquette.
The 69 position can also be done with both of you laying on your sides, which may be a more comfortable option if you plan to keep it going for a longer period of time. This way, you can use each other’s inner thighs as pillows for your heads, making the arrangement very comfy for a more drawn out 69 session.
More advice on how to make your next 69 an A+ after the jump…
Don’t Forget Her
When you’re trying out the 69 position, it’s important to not let the good feelings you are getting distract you from the ones you’re supposed to be giving. This is a mutual oral sex arrangement so it’s not fair if one of you starts concentrating too hard on receiving and neglects to perform as well. If this is a problem for you and you find your mouth constantly becoming lazy while hers is busy, you might be better off performing oral sex on each other separately, so your partner can have your full and undivided attention. This is common sense 69 etiquette.
Stay away from her bum
This position may give you easy access to all her private parts, but it’s part of 69 etiquette to make sure she’s comfortable with it before you explore beyond her vagina. Some people find anal stimulation very pleasurable, but others find it horribly disgusting, so getting an idea of where she stands on the issue before you go anywhere near her bum is a good approach. If she invites you to go there and you’re all for it, then you can let your tongue wander wherever it wants. If you don’t establish this beforehand, you may experience a very abrupt ending to your 69 session.
Peak Pleasure
By following AM’s 69 etiquette, you can have a mutually satisfying oral sex experience and be a considerate gentleman at the same time, which greatly increases your chances of 69ing a second time. It is a truly unique sensation to be giving and receiving oral pleasure at the same time, and one that no one should miss out on.
The G-spot: some think it’s a myth; others are convinced that it’s not only real, but it’s also highly effective in triggering mind-blowing female orgasms. While the scientific community may still be divided on the G-spot’s existence, ask any woman who has had a G-spot orgasm, and she’ll tell you that it’s definitely there, and she wants you to stimulate it.
Locating the G-spot can be an epic quest. It can be remarkably easy to find in some women, while in others it’s almost impossible. If you put your finger insider her vagina with your palm up while she’s on her back and then bring your fingers up in a “come hither” motion, you should be somewhere close to the G-spot. Manual stimulation of the G-spot may be the easiest way to explore its possibilities, but you can also incorporate it into intercourse. If you choose the right positions, you’ll have a greater chance of hitting her G-spot.
From behind
Rear-entry positions are some of the most reliable when it comes to stimulating the G-spot during intercourse. You can try it doggy style or in the spooning position (both of you lying on your sides, facing the same way as you enter her from behind) for a more relaxed option. In order to have the greatest chance of success with a rear-entry position, the penis should rub against the front wall of the vagina. When she’s on all fours, she should arch her back slightly and not put her head down on the bed. You can try lifting her hips a little and thrusting in a downward motion to perfect this G-spot position.
She’s on top
Many women prefer positions in which they are on top. This probably has a lot to do with the fact that when she’s on top, she’s in control. Woman-on-top positions, like cowgirl and its variations, are great for hitting the G-spot because the woman can angle her hips just right, allowing her to find the arrangement that feels best to her. She can try leaning forward or back while adjusting the speed and pressure applied to the G-spot.
The right rotation
Rotated Woman is a tantric sex position that is excellent for stimulating the G-spot. Start by lying flat on your back with her straddling you, facing away. Then she should carefully lean down until she can grab your ankles and is lying on top of you. Once in position, she can move up and down or circle her hips in a figure-eight pattern. The angle makes her vagina tighten up, so the rubbing of the penis provides intense G-spot pleasure. She may also get some clitoral stimulation in this position, so she can have the best of both worlds.
Heels Over Head
Positions in which her feet are on your chest or shoulders are also great G-spot positions. In tantra, this position is referred to as The Flower Press. Start off like you would if you were using the missionary position, then once you have penetrated her, she should lift her legs up and back until they are pressed against your chest or over your shoulders. You can lean against her thighs for support while she grabs your hips and brings you closer for maximum penetration. This G-spot position works because of the angle of the penis as it enters and the depth it can reach.
Fusion
To get into the fusion position, sit up with your legs stretched out in front of you and your arms behind you for support. Your partner should straddle you in the cowgirl position and then lean back, putting her weight on her arms behind her body. She then can rock back and forth. This G-spot position is difficult to maintain for a long time since it will tire her arms quite quickly, but trying it out is worth it since the angle and motion are great for hitting the G-spot.
The proper arrangement
It may take some experimenting before you locate the perfect position that hits her G-spot just right, but this is certainly the kind of work you won’t mind undertaking.
A lot of ink has been spilled over the fact that Britain doesn’t care that Prince William and Kate have probably already done it. But in generations past, the wedding night was indeed special, as it was the first time a couple would have sex with each other. Over time, the importance of premarital virginity has waned considerably and these days it’s quite rare for a newly married couple to be engaging in their first act of sexual intercourse on their wedding night. Regardless, that doesn’t mean that it shouldn’t still be special. Even if you don’t place much importance on that first time as a married couple, chances are your new Mrs. does, so you should make a serious effort to make it memorable for both of you. It will also set the precedent for your future sex life as husband and wife.
Ban Pre-Wedding Sex
You’ve already enjoyed each other carnally, but you can still try to create the kind of anticipation that isn’t normally present in your everyday sex life for this special occasion. For a period of time before the wedding, ban all sexual contact so that your desire for each other will build up until the wedding night. The ban time will vary for each couple, depending on how often you usually get frisky. The basic formula is to hold out for twice as long as you normally would. If you are a few-times-a-week couple, a week-long sex ban should be sufficient, but if you tend to do it only once every other week, you might want to keep up the no sex rule for as long as a month before you say “I do.” To increase the expectation even more, add a “no nudity in each other’s presence” clause to your sex-ban agreement.
Get A Room
You may already be living together before your nuptials, but in order to make your wedding night special, you should spend it somewhere other than home. Put yourself in unfamiliar surroundings by booking a nice hotel room for the night. If you have some room left in the wedding budget, why not spring for the honeymoon suite? The point is to change the venue from the site of your everyday sex life to make your first time as husband and wife seem different and special.
Do It Early
Whether your wedding is a black-tie affair or a casual beach event, the festivities will no doubt leave both of you exhausted by the end of the night. Traditionally, you’re supposed to wait until after the reception is over before you get your chance to be alone together, but you’re already flouting tradition with your premarital sex, so you might as well take a different approach here too. Don’t wait until you’re dead tired and probably at least a little drunk to consummate your marriage. Agree to sneak away during your reception to have a little alone time. The party will continue without you for a while. If need be, explain your plan to your best man and maid of honor so they can cover for you.
Help Her Out Of Her Dress
Chances are your blushing bride is going to be dressed in an elaborate and difficult-to-get-into gown on your wedding night. She needs at least two bridesmaids to hold it up while she goes to the bathroom, so getting it over her head once you make it to the bedroom could be a challenge. Make taking her dress off part of your foreplay instead of letting her struggle with it on her own. Don’t get frustrated with the various buttons, bows and fasteners. Take your time and make it fun.
Married Sex
Now that you’re married, you can let go of any inhibitions you might still have and fully enjoy your sex life with your wife. Married sex doesn’t have to be boring and routine. Start it off right by creating the perfect situation for some mind-blowing sex as husband and wife.
Check out these four tricks to make her orgasm.
Put On Musky Cologne
Smell is the strongest of the five senses when it comes to sexual functioning for two reasons: First, since anything musky mimics testosterone, it’ll kick her libido into high gear. Baby powder can have a similar effect by activating her “scent print,” which links babies to procreation. Second, because smell, sex and memory centers share close quarters in the brain, the scent of arousal leaves the most lasting impression. The second she gets a whiff of your musky cologne, she’ll be transported back to the last time she smelled it on your body.
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Warm Up Her Feet
Every guy knows that when a woman hits the sack she loves to wedge her cold feet between his legs to warm up. Warm feet do more to make a woman physically comfortable than just about anything else — even more so if you want her completely naked, which is not likely to happen if she’s cold, even with the lights off. What most of you probably didn’t realize was the importance of warm feet in increasing the likelihood of her experiencing an orgasm. According to Dutch scientists from the University of Groningen, the odds are increased by 30%. Maybe leaving the socks on isn’t such a bad idea after all. If you want to try something sexier, a foot massage with a warming gel can do wonders, especially if you concentrate on the pads of her toes and the webbing in between, which are linked to her nether zones according to reflexology charts. Moreover, lips, hands, feet, and genitals get the lion’s share of brain space, where feet and genital centers are neighbors, making them share sexy information. Why else do you think women call shoe shopping “retail therapy” — especially when they’re not getting any at home and feeling bummed out? So socks or stilettos, you choose, as long as they’re keeping her tootsies warm.
Focus On Her 10 O’clock And 2 O’clock
When zoning in between her legs, just as you appreciate her indulging more than just your package, she’d like you to go for more than her hood ornament. If you run your tongue around her clitoral head, concentrating on the 10 o’ clock and 2 o’clock marks on either side, and then gently slip your tongue beneath the hood, you’ll have her moaning from ecstasy. While bang-on is too sensitive, those two sweet spots will make sure that she takes a licking and keeps on ticking, thanks to the bulbs hidden just beneath. The best way to pull off this maneuver is to have her straddle your face as you lay comfortably on your back. She’ll get to lean into the headboard so she can drive the action with ease, since you’ve put her in charge.
Kiss The Right Side Of Her Spine
Touch on the right side of a woman’s spine makes her melt more so than the left side, perhaps because the left side of the brain controls her right side and it’s the logical side that can talk her into anything. Whether you’re kissing her there, stroking her or gently teasing her with a tickler, just make sure your moves are curvy. You’ll cover more mileage, not to mention get better mileage out of your touch, since it’s significantly more intense than a straight touch.
Climax Trickery
Time for you to take your tricks for a test drive. With all that attention, her skin will be flushed, her pupils dilated, parts of her shaking, and those she can steady, she’ll be pushing into you — until she’s done and can’t take anymore, that is. Now that’s how to make her orgasm for real.
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What You Need To KnowSome women are flattered when you suggest a threesome, so keep an open mind.Begin by sharing a threesome fantasy and then letting it become a reality organically.Set up ground rules to avoid relationship problems.
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Sure, sex with your partner is smokin’, but how much hotter would it be to add a third person to the mix? At Good In Bed, we know that a threesome, or menage a trois, has crossed the minds of most couples at some point or another, whether as a fantasy or the real thing. And while not everyone is comfortable even suggesting one, a little honesty can go a long way to help you make the fantasy a reality or even just incorporate the fantasy into your own sex life. Here’s how to make threesomes happen.
Keep An Open Mind
When one partner suggests a threesome, it’s easy for the other to feel worried about the state of the relationship. Really, a threesome sex fantasy is a compliment. Any time I’ve had a partner approach me with the idea, I’ve felt flattered and viewed it as a positive sign of their comfort level with me, regardless of whether I actually chose to participate.
Make It A Fantasy First
Your ability to talk about a threesome is a good indicator of the strength of your relationship (and communication is key when it comes to making threesomes happen). In the Good In Bed Guide to 52 Weeks of Amazing Sex, the authors discuss how to get the most juice out of this fantasy, as well as other sexy scenarios. Can you two discuss other sexual topics openly and without embarrassment? If so, this chat is probably going to go a lot more smoothly. Start off by enjoying the concept of a threesome as a sexy secret fantasy between the two of you.
Pretend you’re going to have one and choose celebrities or random people from a crowd that appeal to you both. Now gauge your partner’s reaction. Does she show a spark of interest in the real thing? If not, keep it as a fantasy and use sex toys, porn or role-playing to incorporate it into your sex life. If she is interested, move on to the next step.
Discuss The Details
If your partner shows interest in an actual threesome, it’s time to hash out the details. How do you envision it? How does she? It’s no surprise that about 95% of heterosexual guys prefer a woman to be the “guest star,” and while some female partners agree, others are more interested in adding another man to the mix. Talk about your preferences, including whether you both want to partake, whether one of you wants to watch, or a bit of both.
Set Some Ground Rules
Setting up some threesome rules are a crucial part of pulling it off. Research shows that women can be awfully protective of their emotional bond with their boyfriend or husband. It’s important to realize that if she feels threatened by your “guest star,” your threesome is going to end pretty badly — and so might your relationship. Talk about the ground rules before the night begins: Are you OK with her kissing the third party? Is she all right with you penetrating another woman? Discuss all the potential outcomes so you both know what to expect. Don’t push your partner into anything she’s not ready for.
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